A starter guide to self improvement

Staying calm, composed and maintaining strong self esteem in today's tough environment can be difficult but is not impossible if you follow a few simple guidelines. Here are 6 tips you can use as a starter guide to self improvement. Everything and everyone else around you can affect your self esteem. Other people can deliberately or inadvertently damage your self image. Unchecked people and circumstances can ultimately destroy your self esteem and pull you down in ways you won't even notice. Don't let these influences get the best of you. But what should you avoid? 1 : A Negative Work Environment Beware of a "dog eat dog" environment where everyone else is fighting just to get ahead. This is where non-appreciative people usually thrive and working extra is expected and not rewarded. In this environment no one will appreciate your contributions even if you miss lunch, dinner, and stay at work late into the night. Unless you are very fortunate most of the time you will work too hard with no help from others around you. This type of atmosphere will ruin your self esteem. This is not just healthy competition, at its worst it is brutal and very damaging. 2: Other Peoples Behaviour Bulldozers, brown nosers, gossipmongers, whiners, backstabbers, snipers, people walking wounded, controllers, naggers, complainers, exploders, patronizers, sluffers - whatever you want to call them, all have one thing in common - an overriding desire to prosper at the expense of others. Avoid them and do not be tempted to join them. They may get some short term advantage with their behaviour but deep down most are very insecure, unhappy and ashamed of their behaviour. For most their self esteem disappeared a long time ago. Seeing someone like this prosper is sickening but do not join them - you are better than that! 3: A Changing Environment In today's fast moving society it is difficult if not impossible to avoid change. Changes challenge our paradigms and tests our flexibility, adaptability and alter the way we think. Changes can make your life difficult and may cause stress but, if it's inevitable, you must accept it, don't fight it and in time find ways to improve your life. Try to manage change and try to avoid multiple changes at the same time. If a particular change can't be avoided welcome it. Change will be with us forever, we must learn to live with it. 4: Past Experience We all carry "baggage" - past experiences which have moulded us to who we are today, but some people live in their past experiences - usually something that hurt and still hurts. It's okay to cry out when you experience pain but don't let pain dominate your life as it will transform itself into fears and phobias. If something painful happens, or has happened to you, find a way to minimise the effects. Discuss it with a friend, a family member or a professional if necessary and move on. Don't let it continue to dominate your life and dictate your future actions. Because something bad has happened doesn't mean it will happen again. Learn what you can from any bad experience and move on. 5: Negative World View The television news is full of doom and gloom and it is true that around the world there are many people suffering war, famine or other natural or man-made disasters. Whilst I do not suggest you should not care and do nothing, remember that there are many beautiful positive things happening too. Don't wrap yourself up with all the negative aspects around the world. Learn to look for beauty too for, in building self esteem, we must learn how to be positive in a negative world. 6: Determination Theory Are we a product of our biological inherited characteristics (nature) or a result of the influences we absorb throughout out lives (nurture)? I believe how we are is due to a mixture of both nurture and nature and as a result our behavioural traits are not fixed. Whilst it is true that some things are dictated by genetics (for example race, color and many inherited conditions) your environment and the people in your life have a major effect on your behaviour. You are your own person, you have your own identity and make your own choices. The characteristics your mother or father display are not your destiny. Learn from other people's experience, so you don't suffer the same mistakes. Are some people are born leaders or positive thinkers? I don't believe so. Being positive, and staying positive is a choice. Building self esteem and drawing on positive experiences for self improvement is a choice, not a rule or a talent. No-one will come to you and give you permission to build your self esteem and improve your self. It is in your control. It can be hard to keep positive, especially when others and circumstances seem to be conspiring to pull you down. You need to protect yourself and give yourself a chance to stay positive. Improving your self esteem gives you that protection. One way to stay positive is to minimise your exposure to harmful influences while using affirmations to boost the positive influences in your life. Constantly reminding yourself of the good things in your life will keep the impact of negative influences to a minimum.

Intrinsic motivation

: Intrinsic motivation has been studied by experts since the 1970s and research suggests that intrinsic motivation occurs as a result of a person's achievement in something and enjoyment. For example, if a person does well in his/her driving test then he/she will become more motivated to drive in the long-term as a result of this achievement. Another factor that will help an individual increase through intrinsic factors is when a person wants to solve problems on their own as a result of their energy, passion and hard work. Moreover, situations like this can help a person become more and more motivated in the future as a result of the internal efforts of the individual. Another result of intrinsic motivation is when a person is passionate about something. For example, a person who is about football or soccer would be motivated to either train youngsters play the game or join a local team as a result of their passion. Furthermore, the motivation comes from within the person and this might be down to from an early age or might be down to other factors. Nevertheless, the more an individual uses his/her own efforts to do something the more motivated that person becomes. Some authors distinguish between two forms of intrinsic motivation: one based on enjoyment, the other on obligation. In this context, obligation refers to motivation based on what an individual thinks ought to be done. For instance, a feeling of for a mission may lead to helping others beyond what is easily observable, rewarded, or fun. Intrinsic motivation has been studied by educational psychologists since the 1970s, and numerous studies have found it to be associated with high educational achievement and enjoyment by students. There is currently no universal theory to explain the origin or elements of intrinsic motivation, and most explanations combine elements of Fritz Heider's attribution theory, Bandura's work on self-efficacy and other studies relating to locus of control and goal orientation.